Now that I am 38 weeks pregnant, we are making the final preparations for new baby. Things have been crazy around our house as a result. My husband has been trying to squeeze in last minute things at work in order to take two weeks off. Then both my husband and Judah got sick with that fever/cold that has been going around.
I have been fortunate to have extra help lately by so many people. Our neighbors have offered to babysit Judah a few times so that we can run extra errands and have a date night. We have some friends that offered to bring a meal early. And the grandmas have helped watch Judah. My mother-in-law took him a few weekends ago to the farm for us to have some catch up time at home and my own mom came down this last week to babysit and do laundry.
So we are juggling the last few items on our list. Our shuffle Saturday has been filled with rest and running a few last minute errands. We are also getting the house ready for our family that is coming to help watch Judah while we are at the hospital.
All this has me thinking about new baby and all the company that seems to come with it. From my previous experience, we had the grandmas come to help and a lot of people brought meals. On top of that we had a number of people want to see baby. This was nice but also very exhausting.
Among new moms there seems to be this debate: do you have help come or do you enjoy your time alone with new baby? Of course my perspective has changed since I do need the help this time to take care of Judah, especially after a c-section. You also have to ask yourself what kind of help do you need and for how long.
I will say this. The best advice from last time is limit the number of visitors in the hospital. In part due to my complications I was restricted for having visitors for the first 24 hours after my surgery. The sign posted on the door continued to stay up the rest of the week only allowing doctors and nurses to enter. Then the last day before we went home, we took it down, and we had a day full of visitors which totally exhausted me from recovering.
I would like to hear your thoughts new moms based on your own experiences of what worked, what did not, and how would you do it differently.
Showing posts with label shuffle saturday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shuffle saturday. Show all posts
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Shuffle Saturday: Depression is Not a Dirty Word, Part II
Tis that time of year for most people to have the winter blues. And even though the weather has been generously nice this year, I still sense a lot of friends who seem "down and out" depressed. Depression can be hard to shake but rest assured you can shake it with a little help. I am proof of that.
Most people do not know that I suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder right after Judah was born almost three years ago. Anytime someone feels like they are going to die as in my case when my blood pressure took a nosedive in post Cesarean recovery, you can develop symptoms of stress.
I had experienced depression before. The symptoms remain the same: extreme fatigue, feeling trapped in a spiral downturn with little room for air, irrational thoughts, dark and anxious, emotionally unstable, and the inability to want to do any of your favorite things with your favorite people. Sound familiar. Even my co-author has told her story about depression in part one.
This time Post Traumatic Stress seemed different. I could not sleep and became extremely irritable and anxious. I discovered I would have panic attacks every time I closed my eyes to go to sleep. If I did fall asleep, when I woke up and felt disoriented as to where I was, I would have another panic attack. On top of that I experienced post partum depression because I felt like I could not take care of my baby in this manner. Not fun.
Thankfully I was surrounded by people who loved and cared for me. I realized that you do not need to feel ashamed about getting help or feel guilty for being like this. At some point in our lives, I believe we all go through this. And if managed correctly, we come out on the other side better people.
Here are a few tips that worked for me in coping with stress, anxiety, and depression. I have been through it and know it sucks. I pray that you may find the peace and hope you desperately need during this time as a result of knowing that you are not alone in coping.
1. Seek help immediately. Your loved ones need to be aware of what is going on. And do not be afraid to ask for professional help when needed such as a pyschologist or doctor who prescribe medicine. The longer you wait for help, the harder it will be to cope and come out of depression.
From my previous experience with depression, I immediately saw the symptoms the second time and sought help almost within a few weeks of it starting. I also knew the anxiety was different and so professional help was able to help me figure out what the problem was and how to handle it right away. I know the journey would have been longer and harder had I not admitted I needed help right away.
2. Avoid additional stress. Reduce added stress in your life for a while. Remove all other distractions from your daily schedule. One of the best things I did the first time I was depressed, thanks to the advice of a friend, was limit my daily schedule to only necessary things that had to be done. I also removed those things that seemed to agitate me more until a later time of healing.
3. Take time for yourself. Try to do something for yourself that you think is fun or sounds fun no matter how simple it is. After the baby was born, my family, at the advice of my doctor, tried to get me out of the house on occasions without the baby to prove that life goes on.
4. Set small goals for yourself without expecting huge, immediate results. At one point, I literally had to set goals to get through parts of the day. When my husband went back to work, I had to know exactly when he would come home for lunch and I would focus on getting through those few hours before thinking about the rest of the day when I would start the process over. Also, we learned that certain sights and smells can trigger certain emotions. To counter that, we rearranged the furniture and slept in a different room for a while. Over time, the emotions became less and less as life returned to normal.
5. Pray and Pray. About a year ago, I talk about the power of God when dealing with depression. Please read "Do not be Afraid." Without God, I would never have come out of my anxiety. This is perhaps the most important tip to cope with anxiety.
Again, realize you are not alone. You do not have to feel guilty for feeling this way.
Most people do not know that I suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder right after Judah was born almost three years ago. Anytime someone feels like they are going to die as in my case when my blood pressure took a nosedive in post Cesarean recovery, you can develop symptoms of stress.
I had experienced depression before. The symptoms remain the same: extreme fatigue, feeling trapped in a spiral downturn with little room for air, irrational thoughts, dark and anxious, emotionally unstable, and the inability to want to do any of your favorite things with your favorite people. Sound familiar. Even my co-author has told her story about depression in part one.
This time Post Traumatic Stress seemed different. I could not sleep and became extremely irritable and anxious. I discovered I would have panic attacks every time I closed my eyes to go to sleep. If I did fall asleep, when I woke up and felt disoriented as to where I was, I would have another panic attack. On top of that I experienced post partum depression because I felt like I could not take care of my baby in this manner. Not fun.
Thankfully I was surrounded by people who loved and cared for me. I realized that you do not need to feel ashamed about getting help or feel guilty for being like this. At some point in our lives, I believe we all go through this. And if managed correctly, we come out on the other side better people.
Here are a few tips that worked for me in coping with stress, anxiety, and depression. I have been through it and know it sucks. I pray that you may find the peace and hope you desperately need during this time as a result of knowing that you are not alone in coping.
1. Seek help immediately. Your loved ones need to be aware of what is going on. And do not be afraid to ask for professional help when needed such as a pyschologist or doctor who prescribe medicine. The longer you wait for help, the harder it will be to cope and come out of depression.
From my previous experience with depression, I immediately saw the symptoms the second time and sought help almost within a few weeks of it starting. I also knew the anxiety was different and so professional help was able to help me figure out what the problem was and how to handle it right away. I know the journey would have been longer and harder had I not admitted I needed help right away.
2. Avoid additional stress. Reduce added stress in your life for a while. Remove all other distractions from your daily schedule. One of the best things I did the first time I was depressed, thanks to the advice of a friend, was limit my daily schedule to only necessary things that had to be done. I also removed those things that seemed to agitate me more until a later time of healing.
3. Take time for yourself. Try to do something for yourself that you think is fun or sounds fun no matter how simple it is. After the baby was born, my family, at the advice of my doctor, tried to get me out of the house on occasions without the baby to prove that life goes on.
4. Set small goals for yourself without expecting huge, immediate results. At one point, I literally had to set goals to get through parts of the day. When my husband went back to work, I had to know exactly when he would come home for lunch and I would focus on getting through those few hours before thinking about the rest of the day when I would start the process over. Also, we learned that certain sights and smells can trigger certain emotions. To counter that, we rearranged the furniture and slept in a different room for a while. Over time, the emotions became less and less as life returned to normal.
5. Pray and Pray. About a year ago, I talk about the power of God when dealing with depression. Please read "Do not be Afraid." Without God, I would never have come out of my anxiety. This is perhaps the most important tip to cope with anxiety.
Again, realize you are not alone. You do not have to feel guilty for feeling this way.
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Shuffle Saturday: Stay-at-Home Moms Work Hard Too!
My mom was a stay-at-home mom. She never worked outside the home but rather kept busy caring, loving, and raising us five kids through the years. In her day, staying at home was almost unheard of as her generation established careers outside the home. I never understood her sacrifice nor her dedication until I myself stayed at home.
Today, staying at home is a little more acceptable....or at least more common than it was when my mom did it. I run into quite a few stay-at-home moms on my outings during the week, all with young kids. And we are all getting out of the house.
In spite of staying-at-home being more common, I got the "look" over Christmas from a close acquaintance no less. I believe her comment was "what do you do?" Aside from feeling demeaned, I proceeded to tell her what our weeks look like. We have play group on Monday mornings. We go to music class on Tuesday mornings. We go to story time at the local library on Wednesday mornings. We sometimes go to open gym at the nearby community center. And we always try to do a craft during the week. Then we usually finish the week with a doctors appointment (since I am pregnant). Her response, "Oh, I am so glad you get out."
Did you think staying at home meant we have no life? I would like to speak directly to this often misunderstand misconception before we go on. Yes, we do have a life and it is quite full and very busy.
Please understand that we do work hard, if not harder, than most people.
Just because we stay at home, people falsely perceive us as not working hard and having a lot of extra time on our hands. Need I remind you that if you are a mom with small kids, then you do not have much down time. For every activity we do during the week, please add on the time it takes to get dressed and ready, load up in the car, the time to get home, the time given to lunch, the time to settle down for nap, the time for snack, the evening hour, and so on. On top of that, we attempt to do chores around the house, run errands, play games, and manage our household. I would say, this all happens in a days work.
To further settle the confusion, stay-at-homes moms have the hardest job on earth. I used to work in politics which compared to a normal work environment it is very intense. Political careers and campaigning usually require 24/7 time commitments with low pay, little sleep, lots of work, and time spent away from family and friends. After I became a mom, I tell people that staying at home is so much harder than politics as sometimes you work all night instead of quitting at 10:00pm.
Moms have many different job titles. I would like to think of myself as "Chef, Janitor, Chauffeur, Manager of a Laundromat, Scheduler, Professional Organizer, Seamstress, Photographer, Distributor and Supplier, Decorator, Teacher, and Daycare Provider" to name a few.
The time spent staying at home with young kids may be hard. And honestly some days it is not much fun. The benefits are often too few and far between. But when you do get rewarded by your kid, it is the most worthwhile and fulfilling feeling in the world. Knowing that you are there for your child during the day is rewarding in and of itself. So hats off to all you stay-at-home moms. Keep up the good work and hang in there. We know you are working hard.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Shuffle (Santorum) Saturday
I will be heading back to my hometown of Glidden today to visit with my parents and to attend an event with Rick Santorum. I will post more here once the event is over. :)
Not only did I meet Senator Santorum...
But so did my DAD!
And to my surprise, he spent almost two hours (uninterrupted by his "handlers") answering questions.
I was impressed. And so was dad. Three cheers for family values. Three cheers for someone who sticks with what he says. Three cheers for Rick Santorum!
And now his (albeit barn sign yard capable)yard is hosting a yard sign for Rick Santorum.
Go Rick!!
Not only did I meet Senator Santorum...
But so did my DAD!
And to my surprise, he spent almost two hours (uninterrupted by his "handlers") answering questions.
I was impressed. And so was dad. Three cheers for family values. Three cheers for someone who sticks with what he says. Three cheers for Rick Santorum!
And now his (albeit barn sign yard capable)yard is hosting a yard sign for Rick Santorum.
Go Rick!!
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Dealing with Naughty Sick Kids
This weekend Judah had an ear ache. This means that he does not feel well but well enough to still do normal activities. Even so, Judah always seems to act up more when he does not feel well.
With a plugged ear (as any time he slightly feels bad), Judah seems to scream more, whine more, and overall is more uncontrollable. You can also tell when he is out of sorts as he seems to jump from one thing to another in sort of a destructive, unhappy manner. Typically it is hard to keep up with him on these days.
Most often I am cleaning up the remains of one mess while he is into the next thing. It appears I have to anticipate what is coming next and be proactive in my response approach. I spend a lot of energy in this mode.
In spite all efforts to keep up, entertain, and avoid disaster, we still run into bumps along the way. At some point (and most often more than once) we have melt downs. I think kids do not know how to handle not feeling well and so act out in naughty ways even if they know better. Heck, even adults do this.
The question becomes how do you balance discipline with caring for a sick child? Even though you know they do not feel well, you still cannot allow this naughty behavior. Although you realize this aggression is frustration over feeling poorly, how do you manage or even limit unseemly outbursts.
Do you change your discipline approach? Do you not discipline?
This is something I struggle with quite often when he is sick. I have no answers but rather deal with it as it comes on a case by case basis. You?
With a plugged ear (as any time he slightly feels bad), Judah seems to scream more, whine more, and overall is more uncontrollable. You can also tell when he is out of sorts as he seems to jump from one thing to another in sort of a destructive, unhappy manner. Typically it is hard to keep up with him on these days.
Most often I am cleaning up the remains of one mess while he is into the next thing. It appears I have to anticipate what is coming next and be proactive in my response approach. I spend a lot of energy in this mode.
In spite all efforts to keep up, entertain, and avoid disaster, we still run into bumps along the way. At some point (and most often more than once) we have melt downs. I think kids do not know how to handle not feeling well and so act out in naughty ways even if they know better. Heck, even adults do this.
The question becomes how do you balance discipline with caring for a sick child? Even though you know they do not feel well, you still cannot allow this naughty behavior. Although you realize this aggression is frustration over feeling poorly, how do you manage or even limit unseemly outbursts.
Do you change your discipline approach? Do you not discipline?
This is something I struggle with quite often when he is sick. I have no answers but rather deal with it as it comes on a case by case basis. You?
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: One Week Away
Our move is one week away. I feel like a kid on December 15th. I can't wait for it to be here, yet there's still so much to do.
We've packed up pretty much all of the toys (except the "essentials") and already taken three boxes of toys to Goodwill. And by we, I mean Dave. He's the packer/organizer in the family.
I still don't want to take down the family pictures, not just yet. I feel once pictures are removed from the walls, it's empty and doesn't feel like home.
One week until my Christmas. I'm making my list and checking it twice. And trying to figure out how to use up the food in the pantry and fridge!!
We've packed up pretty much all of the toys (except the "essentials") and already taken three boxes of toys to Goodwill. And by we, I mean Dave. He's the packer/organizer in the family.
I still don't want to take down the family pictures, not just yet. I feel once pictures are removed from the walls, it's empty and doesn't feel like home.
One week until my Christmas. I'm making my list and checking it twice. And trying to figure out how to use up the food in the pantry and fridge!!
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Homecoming!!
My brother was able to get tickets to Iowa State's Homecoming game today...he thought it was only appropriate that an Alumni attend the Homecoming game.
We got up, got the boys to Grandma and Grandpa's house and got up to Ames. It just happened to be the same day that Herman Cain would be stopping my the game...and who am I to turn down a photo op with a Presidential candidate??
So yes, Herman Cain, Iowa State Football and I can't forget the BBQ Pork Nachos.
It was a good day. But now I'm tired and I really hope the kids choose to sleep in tomorrow. I know they'll be up before 6...but a girl can dream, right?
We got up, got the boys to Grandma and Grandpa's house and got up to Ames. It just happened to be the same day that Herman Cain would be stopping my the game...and who am I to turn down a photo op with a Presidential candidate??
So yes, Herman Cain, Iowa State Football and I can't forget the BBQ Pork Nachos.
It was a good day. But now I'm tired and I really hope the kids choose to sleep in tomorrow. I know they'll be up before 6...but a girl can dream, right?
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Enjoy The Season
I love fall. It is my favorite season. The changing leaves, the cooler temperatures, hoodies, football, apples...what's not to love?
We went to the Pumpkin Patch this year, a different one than we've been to in previous years, and we had a great time.
And, of course, we HAD to shoot the corn cannon.
So get out and enjoy the fresh air. It will be winter before we know it!
We went to the Pumpkin Patch this year, a different one than we've been to in previous years, and we had a great time.
And, of course, we HAD to shoot the corn cannon.
So get out and enjoy the fresh air. It will be winter before we know it!
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Do Something For Yourself
I'll admit it. I've always been interested in the paranormal. I'm not sure what it is, but it intrigues me.
Yesterday my husband and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary, which I think can go without saying, is a pretty big deal. We had hoped that we'd be able to go back to my parents house and be able to spend the night at a little Bed and Breakfast where we spent our second night as a married couple and our second anniversary (he was in Iraq on our first anniversary).
In order for us to spend the night at the bed and breakfast, we'd have to have my folks watch the boys. They have just returned from an extended vacation and returned to work this week, so naturally, they're tired. And that's understandable.
Actually, my brother had asked my folks about heading back with his boys this weekend and they turned him down. Since they said no to him, they couldn't say yes to me. Again, understood.
It's important to understand and respect my parents' wishes...if I want them to respect mine. Remember, respect is a two way street.
We had it planned, both ways, for me to go on this ghost hunt, whether we stayed at my parents house or not. Either way, I would ride up with the group from my home or they'd be able to pick me up at my parent's house (as it was on the way).
I am excited (and to be honest, a little nervous) to go on my first ghost hunt. I love the TV Show "Ghost Hunters" and many others.
But I'm doing something for myself. Yes, it will be hard to be that far away from my boys for that long (even if it is just overnight) but I'm excited.
Fingers crossed!
Yesterday my husband and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary, which I think can go without saying, is a pretty big deal. We had hoped that we'd be able to go back to my parents house and be able to spend the night at a little Bed and Breakfast where we spent our second night as a married couple and our second anniversary (he was in Iraq on our first anniversary).
In order for us to spend the night at the bed and breakfast, we'd have to have my folks watch the boys. They have just returned from an extended vacation and returned to work this week, so naturally, they're tired. And that's understandable.
Actually, my brother had asked my folks about heading back with his boys this weekend and they turned him down. Since they said no to him, they couldn't say yes to me. Again, understood.
It's important to understand and respect my parents' wishes...if I want them to respect mine. Remember, respect is a two way street.
We had it planned, both ways, for me to go on this ghost hunt, whether we stayed at my parents house or not. Either way, I would ride up with the group from my home or they'd be able to pick me up at my parent's house (as it was on the way).
I am excited (and to be honest, a little nervous) to go on my first ghost hunt. I love the TV Show "Ghost Hunters" and many others.
But I'm doing something for myself. Yes, it will be hard to be that far away from my boys for that long (even if it is just overnight) but I'm excited.
Fingers crossed!
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Bumbo Recall
Long story short, don't put your baby in a bumbo on an elevated location. EVER. ALWAYS use the bumbo on the floor.
Serious Head Injuries Prompt Recall of Bumbo Baby Sitter Seats - New Warnings and Instructions to Be Provided To Consumers
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, in cooperation with the firm named below, today announced a voluntary recall of the following consumer product. Consumers should stop using recalled products immediately unless otherwise instructed. It is illegal to resell or attempt to resell a recalled consumer product.
Name of Product: Bumbo "Baby Sitter" Seats
Units: About 1 million
Manufacturer: Bumbo International, of South Africa
Hazard: If the seat is placed on a table, countertop, chair, or other elevated surface, young children can arch their backs, flip out of the Bumbo seat, and fall onto the floor, posing a risk of serious head injuries.
Incidents/Injuries: CPSC has received 28 reports of young children falling out of the Bumbo Baby Sitter seat, including three skull fractures, which occurred when children fell out of chairs that had been placed on tables.
Description: The bottom of the children's seat is round and flat with a diameter of about 15 inches. It is constructed of a single piece of molded foam and comes in yellow, blue, purple, pink, aqua, and lime green. The seat has leg holes and seat back that wraps completely around the child. On the front of the seat in raised lettering is the word "Bumbo" with the image of an elephant on top. The bottom of the seat has the following words: "Manufactured by Bumbo South Africa Material: Polyurethane World Patent No. PCT: ZA/1999/00030." The back of the seat contains the following "WARNING" - "Never use on a raised surface. Never use as a car seat or bath seat. Designed for floor level use only. Never leave your baby unattended as the seat is not designed to be totally restrictive and may not prevent release of your baby in the event of vigorous movement."
Sold by: Target, Wal-Mart, Sears, Toys R Us, Babies R Us, USA Babies and various other toy and children's stores nationwide, and various online sellers, from August 2003 through October 2007 for about $40.
Manufactured in: South Africa
Remedy: Consumers should never use the infant seat on a table, countertop, chair, or other elevated surface. Consumers can contact Bumbo to obtain new warning label stickers and instructions, free of charge. The new warning label will state: "WARNING - Prevent Falls; Never use on any elevated surface." Consumers should use the Bumbo seat at ground level, but should never leave a child unattended.
Consumer Contact: Contact Bumbo International at (888) 376-4763 between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday or visit the firm's Web site at http://www.keendistribution.com/customerCare.php
Serious Head Injuries Prompt Recall of Bumbo Baby Sitter Seats - New Warnings and Instructions to Be Provided To Consumers
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, in cooperation with the firm named below, today announced a voluntary recall of the following consumer product. Consumers should stop using recalled products immediately unless otherwise instructed. It is illegal to resell or attempt to resell a recalled consumer product.
Name of Product: Bumbo "Baby Sitter" Seats
Units: About 1 million
Manufacturer: Bumbo International, of South Africa
Hazard: If the seat is placed on a table, countertop, chair, or other elevated surface, young children can arch their backs, flip out of the Bumbo seat, and fall onto the floor, posing a risk of serious head injuries.
Incidents/Injuries: CPSC has received 28 reports of young children falling out of the Bumbo Baby Sitter seat, including three skull fractures, which occurred when children fell out of chairs that had been placed on tables.
Description: The bottom of the children's seat is round and flat with a diameter of about 15 inches. It is constructed of a single piece of molded foam and comes in yellow, blue, purple, pink, aqua, and lime green. The seat has leg holes and seat back that wraps completely around the child. On the front of the seat in raised lettering is the word "Bumbo" with the image of an elephant on top. The bottom of the seat has the following words: "Manufactured by Bumbo South Africa Material: Polyurethane World Patent No. PCT: ZA/1999/00030." The back of the seat contains the following "WARNING" - "Never use on a raised surface. Never use as a car seat or bath seat. Designed for floor level use only. Never leave your baby unattended as the seat is not designed to be totally restrictive and may not prevent release of your baby in the event of vigorous movement."
Sold by: Target, Wal-Mart, Sears, Toys R Us, Babies R Us, USA Babies and various other toy and children's stores nationwide, and various online sellers, from August 2003 through October 2007 for about $40.
Manufactured in: South Africa
Remedy: Consumers should never use the infant seat on a table, countertop, chair, or other elevated surface. Consumers can contact Bumbo to obtain new warning label stickers and instructions, free of charge. The new warning label will state: "WARNING - Prevent Falls; Never use on any elevated surface." Consumers should use the Bumbo seat at ground level, but should never leave a child unattended.
Consumer Contact: Contact Bumbo International at (888) 376-4763 between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday or visit the firm's Web site at http://www.keendistribution.com/customerCare.php
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Those Random Kids.
So today we went on an family outing to the Living History Farms in Des Moines. Yes, we used our free tickets celebrating Museum Day. We enjoyed the day looking at the farm animals, riding the tractor, and running up and down the old town board walk - all thanks to Judah who kept us moving!
At one point we were walking along on the path and this random kid comes up to hang out with my son. He was much older but started playing with him and talking to him. Later, the same thing happened as we were watching the pigs on the farmstead. A girl older than Judah came up to start hanging out with us. She was just carrying up a conversation and followed us from one exhibit to another while at the farm.
Both times, I remember thinking, "where are their parents." I am not opposed to being social or making new friends. As a matter of fact both Judah and I are people magnets as we love to be social.
This was different though. I almost felt like these kids were hanging out with us for the attention. No parents in sight. They were not really being bad but perhaps maybe a little annoying or daring. They wanted someone to talk too. Show off too. Hang with. Tell them no even.
I cannot count how many times this happened to me this summer while Judah and I went places. I recount one instance at the play ground this young girl hung out with us while we swung. Imagine my dismay when she asked me to push her on the swing.
Again, I have no problem with kids. And does not God call us to love and be kind to others.
Rather my problem lies in where are the parents. It makes me sad to think that parents do not care where their kids are, what they are doing, or what interests their child. The fact that a child goes up to a total stranger and starts telling their life story disturbs me to no end. Do parents really not have time or a care for their kids?
It kind of reminds me of the mom who drops their kids off at the mall for a couple of hours. Thoughts?
At one point we were walking along on the path and this random kid comes up to hang out with my son. He was much older but started playing with him and talking to him. Later, the same thing happened as we were watching the pigs on the farmstead. A girl older than Judah came up to start hanging out with us. She was just carrying up a conversation and followed us from one exhibit to another while at the farm.
Both times, I remember thinking, "where are their parents." I am not opposed to being social or making new friends. As a matter of fact both Judah and I are people magnets as we love to be social.
This was different though. I almost felt like these kids were hanging out with us for the attention. No parents in sight. They were not really being bad but perhaps maybe a little annoying or daring. They wanted someone to talk too. Show off too. Hang with. Tell them no even.
I cannot count how many times this happened to me this summer while Judah and I went places. I recount one instance at the play ground this young girl hung out with us while we swung. Imagine my dismay when she asked me to push her on the swing.
Again, I have no problem with kids. And does not God call us to love and be kind to others.
Rather my problem lies in where are the parents. It makes me sad to think that parents do not care where their kids are, what they are doing, or what interests their child. The fact that a child goes up to a total stranger and starts telling their life story disturbs me to no end. Do parents really not have time or a care for their kids?
It kind of reminds me of the mom who drops their kids off at the mall for a couple of hours. Thoughts?
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Fixing Family Ties-Not Holding Grudges
My dad always used to say "You can't choose your family, but you can choose your friends." I honestly believe that God brings people into everyone's life for a reason.
Some people are brought into our lives to test us, some are brought to heal, some to teach and some MAKE us learn...even if what they're saying isn't what we THINK we want to hear at the time.
It's just too convenient to meet the "right" person who tells you the "right" thing at the "right" time. And maybe, just maybe, this blog post will be the "right" timing for someone out there.
I hate it when I go to funerals and there's almost always that one person who is inconsolable. And then you find out that that one person said/did/whatever it was to the deceased and never had a chance to make amends.
My husband's grandmother had a brother that she fought with. No one could remember the reason for the argument but they never spoke. Years went by without correspondence. And then he died. She flew to Arizona to say goodbye and attend his funeral. My husband's grandma was THAT person. But then, on her flight home, she developed a blood clot in her leg, it moved to her brain. The day after getting off of the plane she woke up, went downstairs, sat in her rocking chair and died.
Now, I'm not saying if you don't mend fences today you're going to die...that's not the point at all. But wouldn't it be nice to be able to say all of the good things that people remember at funerals and wakes to the person while they're still alive.
Life is too short. People need to realize when they've made mistakes, suck it up, apologize and learn from it.
Maybe you're mad at me for writing this...but think. Is this what you really needed to hear right now?
Some people are brought into our lives to test us, some are brought to heal, some to teach and some MAKE us learn...even if what they're saying isn't what we THINK we want to hear at the time.
It's just too convenient to meet the "right" person who tells you the "right" thing at the "right" time. And maybe, just maybe, this blog post will be the "right" timing for someone out there.
I hate it when I go to funerals and there's almost always that one person who is inconsolable. And then you find out that that one person said/did/whatever it was to the deceased and never had a chance to make amends.
My husband's grandmother had a brother that she fought with. No one could remember the reason for the argument but they never spoke. Years went by without correspondence. And then he died. She flew to Arizona to say goodbye and attend his funeral. My husband's grandma was THAT person. But then, on her flight home, she developed a blood clot in her leg, it moved to her brain. The day after getting off of the plane she woke up, went downstairs, sat in her rocking chair and died.
Now, I'm not saying if you don't mend fences today you're going to die...that's not the point at all. But wouldn't it be nice to be able to say all of the good things that people remember at funerals and wakes to the person while they're still alive.
Life is too short. People need to realize when they've made mistakes, suck it up, apologize and learn from it.
Maybe you're mad at me for writing this...but think. Is this what you really needed to hear right now?
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Iowa's Own Superbowl- Iowa vs Iowa State...Brothers battle it out.
The big question of the day, are you an Iowa fan or Iowa State fan?
I'm for the Cyclones...that's because I did attend Iowa State. It's my Alma Mater. Of course I'm cheering for the Cyclones!!
My favorite joke? "What do Iowa and Iowa State fans have in common? Neither went to Iowa."
I love my Cyclones. And my kids are Cyclone fans.
My Aunt who lives in Arizona sent me a Hawkeye outfit when my second son was born. She thought it was the right team, but it wasn't. Anyway, my little guy fit well into it and I thought it would make for a cute picture last year...big brother vs. little brother.
Big brother says, "Can't we all just get along?"
But the battle for CyHawk in the Bowman living room begins...
And, like usual, Iowa plays dirty.
And then Iowa attacks...
Iowa State tries to fight back...but after getting yelled at by mom to be nice to his little brother...
Iowa thinks he's won...and like most Iowa fans after the game...
He passes out.
So who are you rooting for? This year the Iowa outfit it too small for my boys so they're decked out in Cardinal and Gold. GO STATE!!!
I'm for the Cyclones...that's because I did attend Iowa State. It's my Alma Mater. Of course I'm cheering for the Cyclones!!
My favorite joke? "What do Iowa and Iowa State fans have in common? Neither went to Iowa."
I love my Cyclones. And my kids are Cyclone fans.
My Aunt who lives in Arizona sent me a Hawkeye outfit when my second son was born. She thought it was the right team, but it wasn't. Anyway, my little guy fit well into it and I thought it would make for a cute picture last year...big brother vs. little brother.
But the battle for CyHawk in the Bowman living room begins...
And, like usual, Iowa plays dirty.
And then Iowa attacks...
Iowa State tries to fight back...but after getting yelled at by mom to be nice to his little brother...
Iowa thinks he's won...and like most Iowa fans after the game...
He passes out.
So who are you rooting for? This year the Iowa outfit it too small for my boys so they're decked out in Cardinal and Gold. GO STATE!!!
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Shopping with Toddlers!
Shopping with toddler is not easy and so you pick your trips, planning your outings very carefully. This morning we even had both mommy and daddy to go shopping for shoes. For what seemed like a simple trip ended up exhausting all of us - just to find some shoes for this fall.
Toddlers have their own opinions. They seem to be very good at expressing their own independent ideas at just the right time. In this mornings case, it was what shoes he wanted to try on or did not want to try on. He also was good at telling us what other items he wanted to look at in the store...and touch....and hold. Then he though it would be fun to rearrange the mats on the store floor.
Toddlers also have a lot of energy that find its way out in strange ways. Again this morning it was taking his socks and shoes that he came with on and off. He then thought it would be fun to run away from mommy and daddy (against multiple warnings), hiding through the aisles. Daddy ended up chasing him (to his delight and our horror) clear across the store.
Finally we found a pair of shoes that we all agreed on and we headed to the check out. Even then we were tired, ready for a melt down anytime. But we made it home, putting aside all other errands we had to do this morning.
Do you have any shopping stories you would like to share or types on reigning in your toddler?
Toddlers have their own opinions. They seem to be very good at expressing their own independent ideas at just the right time. In this mornings case, it was what shoes he wanted to try on or did not want to try on. He also was good at telling us what other items he wanted to look at in the store...and touch....and hold. Then he though it would be fun to rearrange the mats on the store floor.
Toddlers also have a lot of energy that find its way out in strange ways. Again this morning it was taking his socks and shoes that he came with on and off. He then thought it would be fun to run away from mommy and daddy (against multiple warnings), hiding through the aisles. Daddy ended up chasing him (to his delight and our horror) clear across the store.
Finally we found a pair of shoes that we all agreed on and we headed to the check out. Even then we were tired, ready for a melt down anytime. But we made it home, putting aside all other errands we had to do this morning.
Do you have any shopping stories you would like to share or types on reigning in your toddler?
Saturday, August 20, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: The Iowa State Fair!
"Our State Fair is a great state fair
Don't Miss it don't even be late
(our state fair is great)
It's dollars to doughnuts at our state fair
It's the best state fair in the state"
Don't Miss it don't even be late
(our state fair is great)
It's dollars to doughnuts at our state fair
It's the best state fair in the state"
I was singing these lyrics from the famous Roger and Hammerstein musical, State Fair, to my toddler Judah yesterday as we got ready for the Iowa State Fair. So naturally you heard this little tyke quoting, "don't even be late." Too cute.
The Iowa State Fair has become a tradition at our house. I grew up with an August birthday. One year, my parents asked me what I wanted to do and being from northeast Iowa (two hours away from Des Moines, the location of the fair), I mentioned I wanted to go to the Iowa State Fair. We had never been to the fair up to this point and after hearing about it from friends and seeing the commercials, I wanted to check it out. Every year since, my family and now my own family spends some time at the Iowa State Fair. And I think that is where Sarah is today as well with her family.
The Iowa State Fair has become more than an icon for Iowa residents and a stop for national political candidates. It is a tradition. Our family tradition. Each year we have our check list of must see items, eat items, and do items at the Iowa State Fair.
And the fair is never complete until we accomplish all on our list for that year. We have it down to a system; depending on where we are on the grounds, we make sure to take time to see something specific like the celebrated butter cow, the sand sculpture, see the western old village, view the "Hall of Breeds," or tour the 4-H building. We also know the food vendors inside and out and plan our meals and snacks around what we have not eaten yet: pork chop on a stick (from the Pork Producers), smoked turkey leg, our lamb burger (from Lamb Producers), cheeseburger (from Cattleman's Association), an ice cream cone (from the Dairy Barn), a giant dill pickle, an egg on a stick, and much more fried, greasy, and tasty flavors to fill our bellies.
On the side we squeeze in time for a show on one of the grounds many stages or at the Grand Stands. Other times we have participated in the sewing contest. Occasionally we hit the midway for rides. And we certainly enjoy the tractor pull.
This year Judah had fun posing by all the painted, ceramic cows in celebration of the 100 years "Butter Cow" exhibit. He particularly enjoyed seeing the giant pumpkins in front of the horticulture building and seeing the animals in the barns. He also danced along to some oldies and drooled over the cakes from the cake contest (calling them Happy Birthday cakes).
So once again for another year, we celebrated a family tradition. And today we are tired but it was well worth the time together. What are your favorite family traditions? Even more so, if you are a fair goer yourself, what are your favorite fair memories?
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Iowa Straw Poll Day! Tips From a Veteran!
It's straw poll day in Iowa. For those involved in politics in Iowa, this is our Superbowl, our Oscars, our Olympics...it's a big deal. And I'm excited. I had a hard time sleeping last night because I was so excited. Even more so than 4 years ago. And back then I had a VIP pass!
This year is my husband's first year, as he was in Iraq four years ago. Even though he's a native Iowan and we've been together for 8 years, he still had no idea how big of a deal the Straw Poll really is. I feel he's still going to be amazed.
So from a Straw Poll veteran, here's a few tips...if you haven't left already.
1. Go hungry. There's going to be plenty of food.
2. Wear comfortable shoes. If you're going to go tent cruising, you'll be doing a lot of walking. While the Vera Wang black heels are cute, they're not practical.
3. Greet the candidates. Don't be afraid of them. They're people just like you and me. And they want to meet you. Don't be nervous. Ask them the tough questions you have. They WANT to meet real people. That's why they're there.
4. Listen to the speakers. Take the time to listen to everyone, not just your particular candidate. You'll learn something.
And last but not least,
5. Don't feed the trolls. I was given this great piece of advice from Nansen via Britney at RightOnline this year and they are so right. There will be people protesting, yelling, trying to get you to react. DO NOT FEED THE TROLLS. They thrive off of attention.
And most of all, have fun. Enjoy the day. And please, don't feed the trolls.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Mommy Moments!
My first vivid mommy moment (I remember like it was yesterday, it was so traumatic) comes to mind when I was pregnant with Judah. We were packing to visit family over Thanksgiving. Since I had just started showing, I was packing maternity clothes into the small suitcase that my husband and I normally share together.
Hormones got the better of me as Tim simply found me laying on the floor next to the half packed suitcase crying. Clearly he was concerned, inquiring after me. Still crying, I informed him that there was not enough room to share the suitcase with him this time. My clothes were simply taking all the room. He responded by telling me not to fret, that he would find something else. Crying even louder, I mentioned that I was not even done packing myself and all my clothes were not going to fit. At that point, I had had my first melt down over feeling too big.
We both laugh now when we think of that story. How topsy turvy things get when you are pregnant. Your body is changing. Your hormones are off. And you cry at almost anything.
I may have gotten emotionally more stable once Judah was born, but let's face it, I still have those (what I call) mommy meltdown moments. I am in fact a mom! You know when you have had just enough whether from the kids, your spouse, or your circumstances that you just explode. You either get so upset you cry, yell, or literally lock yourself in the bathroom.
And do not forget every mom goes through that "it has been one of those days." My neighbor and I in fact quite often get together on these days for moral support (or so we don't kill someone or ourselves). After all as moms we see our toddlers who throw temper tantrums, school aged kids who mouth back, and teenagers who disobey. We ourselves are entitled to some meltdown at some point especially when we are strong for our family.
So today, let's take a break to celebrate our mommy moments. I am sure you have your own stories to tell.
Hormones got the better of me as Tim simply found me laying on the floor next to the half packed suitcase crying. Clearly he was concerned, inquiring after me. Still crying, I informed him that there was not enough room to share the suitcase with him this time. My clothes were simply taking all the room. He responded by telling me not to fret, that he would find something else. Crying even louder, I mentioned that I was not even done packing myself and all my clothes were not going to fit. At that point, I had had my first melt down over feeling too big.
We both laugh now when we think of that story. How topsy turvy things get when you are pregnant. Your body is changing. Your hormones are off. And you cry at almost anything.
I may have gotten emotionally more stable once Judah was born, but let's face it, I still have those (what I call) mommy meltdown moments. I am in fact a mom! You know when you have had just enough whether from the kids, your spouse, or your circumstances that you just explode. You either get so upset you cry, yell, or literally lock yourself in the bathroom.
And do not forget every mom goes through that "it has been one of those days." My neighbor and I in fact quite often get together on these days for moral support (or so we don't kill someone or ourselves). After all as moms we see our toddlers who throw temper tantrums, school aged kids who mouth back, and teenagers who disobey. We ourselves are entitled to some meltdown at some point especially when we are strong for our family.
So today, let's take a break to celebrate our mommy moments. I am sure you have your own stories to tell.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Save St. Patrick's Church
This past Tuesday, I ventured back with my boys to Glidden to visit St. Patrick's Church on Cedar. It is at risk of being demolished. While it isn't an active parish, they still occasionally have Mass there. And my dad always makes sure to sing at Mass, even if it means he has to schedule a day off of work. It's that important to our family.
Why? Because it's where our ancestors worshiped. It's where our ancestors are buried. It's our roots.
It's a beautiful Church, isn't it?
And it was great to see my boys, Sean and Liam, exploring the grave site of his Great Great Great Grandfather Michael, who came from Ireland.
It almost looks like Liam is praying, doesn't it? I wouldn't be surprised if he was.
My boys have learned a lot about saving history. They've learned a lot about their past. They know they're Catholic. They know they come from a farm family. They love their Irish heritage and they love St. Patrick's Church.
If you're interested in helping the cause, please feel free to sign the petition to Save St. Patrick's Church. Thank you!!
Why? Because it's where our ancestors worshiped. It's where our ancestors are buried. It's our roots.
It's a beautiful Church, isn't it?
And it was great to see my boys, Sean and Liam, exploring the grave site of his Great Great Great Grandfather Michael, who came from Ireland.
It almost looks like Liam is praying, doesn't it? I wouldn't be surprised if he was.
My boys have learned a lot about saving history. They've learned a lot about their past. They know they're Catholic. They know they come from a farm family. They love their Irish heritage and they love St. Patrick's Church.
If you're interested in helping the cause, please feel free to sign the petition to Save St. Patrick's Church. Thank you!!
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Shuffle Saturday: Chore Cooperation!
When I was growing up, I slept in like any usual teenager. I would finally wake up to a quiet house, walk downstairs for breakfast, and find a note lying on the kitchen table. The note was always that dreaded "to do" chore list with a short note from our parents saying that they would be back shortly after running a few errands. And while they were gone, we needed to vacuum, dust, and unload the dishwasher among many others.
While most families grew up watching Saturday morning cartoons, other families got ready for that Saturday soccer tournament. And we had seasons where we did just that. However, I remember at our house growing up, Saturday mornings meant those dreaded chores and it seemed like a lot of them.
This begs the question, when do you do your chores at your house? or run errands?
Most Saturdays now, we run our errands in the morning and come home to rest in the afternoon. It is not until after we rest that we start working on some things around the house that require all our cooperation.
Occasionally, we have a "to do" list or a project that demands our attention most of the day. For example, last weekend, my husband shampooed and vacuumed the carpet in the house. He also changed the toilet seat lids with new ones. Most of these big projects are easier to do when daddy is home on the weekends.
As far as daily chores, I like to get those done during the weekdays and early evenings so as to free up our weekends for family fun. I have learned that those dreaded chores are easier to do in late afternoons when energies and mood levels tend to peak, doing a little at a time each day. By four o'clock in the afternoon, everyone needs to work out some energy, including the kids. You are able to accomplish more together with this excess energy. And that is when I start supper, put in my daily load of laundry, and tidy a bit around the house.
But I am not perfect. In fact, I did not do my dishes last night which means I have more to do tonight. Hmmm....better go do that.
While most families grew up watching Saturday morning cartoons, other families got ready for that Saturday soccer tournament. And we had seasons where we did just that. However, I remember at our house growing up, Saturday mornings meant those dreaded chores and it seemed like a lot of them.
This begs the question, when do you do your chores at your house? or run errands?
Most Saturdays now, we run our errands in the morning and come home to rest in the afternoon. It is not until after we rest that we start working on some things around the house that require all our cooperation.
Occasionally, we have a "to do" list or a project that demands our attention most of the day. For example, last weekend, my husband shampooed and vacuumed the carpet in the house. He also changed the toilet seat lids with new ones. Most of these big projects are easier to do when daddy is home on the weekends.
As far as daily chores, I like to get those done during the weekdays and early evenings so as to free up our weekends for family fun. I have learned that those dreaded chores are easier to do in late afternoons when energies and mood levels tend to peak, doing a little at a time each day. By four o'clock in the afternoon, everyone needs to work out some energy, including the kids. You are able to accomplish more together with this excess energy. And that is when I start supper, put in my daily load of laundry, and tidy a bit around the house.
But I am not perfect. In fact, I did not do my dishes last night which means I have more to do tonight. Hmmm....better go do that.
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