Tooth Thursday: The Dentist with Our 4 Year Old...And I Feel The Worst.

Brendan (4), aka B, had three cavities filled today.  He played with another little boy (his mom called him T and he was 6) with Legos in the waiting room.

B climbed into the chair, and when the dental assistant said, "I have to put this bib on you," B replied, "I know."

I said, "It's not Cavity Carl's first rodeo." He's had three cavities before.

The dentist thinks it's due to a lack of enamel. Dr. Kerby asked if I had taken antibiotics during pregnancy, and I had. And yes, I feel bad.

The 6 year old was in the chair next door. He was SCREAMING. B said, "What's his problem?" The assistant said, "He has to have one cavity filled. They are just putting the bib on him."

B replied, "I have free (3) cavities! And have da bib. And he's older dan me!"
I reminded him, "It's not a competition, dear."

B had "the gas" to help with the pain.

I asked B what he wanted, if he was good. Last night, his oldest brother got a slinky after a good parent/teacher conference. So, of course, all he wanted was a "swinky" of his own.

He sat so very still, he had tears in his eyes, the assistant wiped them away with the bib when they would run down his face. But he never once complained. One of his cavities was between his front teeth, and they had to get special small equipment to help fill it. B was a trooper.

And he got his "swinky" at Target after the fillings. I feel like a horrible mom, for him having low enamel on his teeth because of my antibiotics when I was pregnant with him, but God blessed us with such a tolerant and strong little dude.

Way to go, B. And yes, Mommy is sorry.

Tip Tuesday: Keep That Baby IN!

I'm so thankful today. I've hit the 20 week mark of pregnancy. And as I posted to my Facebook account, I'm halfway there. With the scares we had early on (being on restrictions and considered high risk) I'm so thankful.

Yes, pregnancy IS 40 weeks. Don't let anyone tell you different. Now, if you've had a medical reason, like my co-author and her gestational diabetes, that's different.

I had a chat with my mother in law's neighbor the other day. She, too, is expecting. But it's her first. And she said to me, "You're so lucky! You'll be scheduled. I'm such a planner, I'm hoping my doctor will schedule me too, a few weeks early since it'll be hot."

And if you know me, you know it took everything in me not to punch her in the nose.

Babies are not on YOUR schedule, you're on theirs. And the sooner you figure that out, the better. I found out the hard way, with my first. We were due November 15th. That day came and went. People were even asking why I wasn't at the hospital having him. Ummm...because he's not ready?

Liam finally arrived, ELEVEN days late, and only after some coaxing. AFTER his due date came and went, we tried the driving over the train tracks trick (and got yelled at by my Doc), spicy foods...nothing worked. He just wasn't ready to come. When he finally did, my mother (a nurse) was upset because she could tell he was WAY overdue. And you could tell. They had to add amniotic fluid and his skin was dry and wrinkled. He had almost no vernix left.

It breaks my heart to see babies born at 28, 30, 32 weeks and have to spend time in the NICU. It even breaks my heart to see babies born at 36 weeks when they get sick shortly after they're born...because they just weren't ready.

I don't care if you're uncomfortable, suck it up. I don't care if it's hot. Women have been hot for thousands of years (without air conditioning, mind you) and managed. You can too. My youngest was born in July. It was hot. I was miserable. And I had back labor at home for a full day before going in...because he just wasn't ready. This baby is due in August. It will be hot. But I won't be going in early just because I'M miserable. Because guess what, it's not about ME. It's about the health of my baby.

Suck it up. Put your big girl panties on. Be a mother and think about what is best for your kids, not what works for you.

I've always had my Docs wait until I go into labor. And I do. They don't run the show, I don't run the show. It's my baby's birthday. And HE will decide when HE'S ready to come.

Tip Tuesday: The Love Of A Mother--Are Ultrasounds Really Safe?

No one questions that mothers love their children. No one questions that expecting mothers can't wait for their ultrasound date. The chance to peek into your own uterus and see your growing child? It's magical.

But it's also not proven to be entirely safe. I do a lot of reading...maybe too much. But when it comes to my kids, there's no such thing as keeping them too safe. When I was expecting my first child, I read and read and read...and I haven't stopped. But 6 years ago I read about the dangers of ultrasounds. That's when I decided that ONLY medically necessary ultrasounds would be the route we would go.

With our first son, the ultrasound showed that he might have an issue with his kidneys. The doctors wanted to be prepared in case something was wrong, that they'd be able to do kidney surgery on him right after birth. They scheduled a second ultrasound ten weeks later (32 weeks) and discovered the kidneys were totally healthy. When he was almost two weeks overdue, he failed the "kick counts" and the doctor told me to leave work and rush to an ultrasound. He was fine, just running out of room. So my first pregnancy I had three ultrasounds. Not what I had intended.

Every pregnancy there after, we've only had one ultrasound per child. No additional ultrasounds were necessary. This baby (yes, #4) we will probably have two ultrasounds. Why two? Well, we already had one (unintentionally) because the Doctors were looking for what we all thought was a ruptured cyst...turns out, it was a hemorrhage...and a baby. I will have one more ultrasound (around the "normal" 20ish weeks) to make sure everything is growing, that the placenta has attached as it should (a danger because of the hemorrhage/high risk pregnancy) and maybe, if baby cooperates, to see the gender.

And that's it. No extra ultrasounds. No "fun" pictures. Why? It's not safe. It's not necessary. And it could be harming the baby. Did you know that ultrasounds destroy sperm? They actually use it as a form of temporary sterilization. What makes it safe for a baby?

I've also heard the "it's my body and I can do what I want." Interesting. This is the same argument that pro-choice people use. But it's not just your body. It's affecting the baby as well.

According to WebMD, some parents are opting for a 4-D scan. "Some facilities are providing this scan at the parents' request without a specific medical indication. A moving picture interpretation is referred to as a 4-D ultrasound. According to the March of Dimes, the FDA, as well as many other experts, the use of these non-medical ultrasounds is discouraged since untrained personnel may provide inaccurate or harmful information."

No, thanks. I'm going to take the word of the FDA, the March of Dimes and the safety of my child over my want to see the baby.

My friend, fellow Conservative blogger and Doctor wrote an article about this subject. She says, "My son, and his twin who died, both hated the ultrasound. It seemed to cause them physical pain from what I observed. They became agitated. It is known that the amniotic fluid warms up at least a degree from the ultrasound."

Again, no one questions the love a mother has for her child. If every mother knew of the dangers and read more about all of their options, maybe they would put the safety of their child ahead of their want.

You'll see and hold your baby soon enough...let them be safe in the safest place in the world. Your womb. Don't open them up to unnecessary dangers.

Edit: Upon further research, I discovered that the Ethics Committee within the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology has discouraged the use of non-medical ultrasounds during pregnancy. You can read their opinion here.

Shuffle Saturday: Pregnancy Pictures on Facebook (Or Anywhere Else on the Internet)

Pregnant and putting picture of your belly on facebook because it's fun? It's not the best idea.

Remember the rule. Don't put anything on the internet you wouldn't want on a billboard somewhere. Would you approve a picture of yourself, pregnant, belly exposed, in a bathroom mirror on a billboard? I doubt it.

Yes. I am pregnant. Maybe that's why I feel I can say it. Maybe it's because I'm "older". Maybe I'm more mature. Maybe it's being taught to be more Conservative. But I know not everyone wants an exposed belly of a friend on their news feed...baby in utero or not.

A few of my younger friends, God bless em, are expecting too. And they'll probably get mad at me for writing this...but I know they'll thank me in a few years...and wonder why they didn't listen....

OMG, we get it. You're pregnant. I really don't need to see a daily/weekly belly pic update from your bathroom mirror. And arch your back a little more...because you didn't stick it out quite as much as you did last week.

Don't get me wrong, I think a pregnant body is beautiful. I just don't want it in my news feed EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

Besides, it's not safe. Disagree? So did Jamie Stice.

Don't know who she is? Well, she posted pictures of her belly on facebook, a crazy woman friended her, killed her and cut the baby out of her stomach. Thinking twice now? You should.

Not safe. So remember, if you feel the need to post exposed belly pregnancy pictures on your facebook, know that not everyone appreciates it. And not everyone has the best intentions.

Just trying to keep you and your baby safe. Remember, you might be mad at me now, but you'll thank me.

Tip Tuesday: Listen to your body

I know, I know. This should be a no brainer. But for moms, it's not. We often put ourselves (and our health) on the back burner. And we shouldn't. I have to remind myself of the instructions on a airplane. "In case of a lack of cabin pressure, put on YOUR oxygen mask first, and then help others." But I failed to do that.

As you know, I'm involved in politics. And the Iowa Caucus? That's like the Superbowl for us Iowans...and it only comes once every four years. Between moving in November, hosting my six year old's birthday party and Thanksgiving, a house warming party, preparing for Christmas and the caucus, I've been busy...and been having low back pain. But I put it off. "I'll get it checked out after the caucus" I kept telling myself. And being tough, I refused to take anything for it. That was probably a good call on my behalf.

On New Years Eve, an Uncle of mine unexpectedly passed away. They scheduled the funeral for the day after the caucus. On caucus day, we had the Huffington Post follow us around and get the point of view of caucus attendees. You can watch our caucus experience here.

It was a whirlwind day. Interviews, caucus, victory party...and I was named a Washington Post Reader Favorite Top Iowa Political Tweeter (you can follow me on twitter @bowmama, and our blog is also on twitter @mommysrecess). At our caucus location I spoke on behalf of Rick Santorum...in front of about 1200 people and a slew of reporters. Did I mention I had to follow Rick Perry (himself) and Ann Romney (wife of Mitt)? Yeah, no pressure there. All the while, I had to mentally prep myself as I was doing the readings at my Uncle's funeral mass the next day.

Our boys spent the night at Grandma and Grandpas (thankfully) because we didn't get to bed until after 1AM and had to get up at 6AM in order to make it back to the funeral in time.

I made it through the readings without crying, but after I read, I saw my mom crying and, well, you know how it is when your mom cries...you cry. So I cried. At the luncheon after the cemetary, we learned that my great aunt had been in a car accident and was being life-flighted to Omaha. She had two collapsed lungs, broke her C2 and C3, compressed disks, etc etc. The remainder of the week was spent checking in with mom to see how my Great Aunt was doing, and trying to get back into a normal routine.

And then Saturday night happened. My husband worked on Saturday. When he got home, we had dinner. At dinner, I stood up to get a napkin and started bleeding. Heavy. Fast. I raced to the bathroom and even my medic husband was concerned. I called Mercy Nurse and she told me to come in. I explained the back pain and we both thought an ovarian cyst had ruptured (I have a history of cysts). My husband dressed the boys and called his parents. We rushed them over and went to the ER. The nurse took my vitals, asked for a urine sample and took blood. They hooked me up to an IV because I was dizzy from all of the blood I lost. And then it was time for an ultrasound to see where the cyst had ruptured.

But there was no cyst. There was, however, a strong heart beat. And a 7 week 5 day baby inside. Surprise.

The first thing I said? "Holy CRAP! There's a baby in there!" Not the most eloquent thing I've ever said but I was in shock!

My husband and I were both so surprised. And so was the ultrasound tech. And the nurse. And the Doctor. The amount of blood I lost, we had prepped ourselves for the possibility of a miscarriage. But like his/her mom, "Noodle" (what my oldest has nicknamed the baby) is strong.

They did find a bleed and called it a subchorianic hemorrhage. My instructions were to take it easy and monitor the bleeding. I go to the doctor today for a check up.

Long story short? Listen to your body. Had I gone to the Doctor when I had the pain weeks ago, this probably couldn't have been avoided but at least I would have known.

I've had enough drama in 2012 to write a whole Christmas letter. You hear that 2012? No more drama. And I've learned to listen to my body. Don't put your health off. And be sure to put on the oxygen mask first, and then assist others.

Tip Tuesday: Yak Trax

It's coming. The four letter S-word...snow. It's in the forecast for tonight. I am thankful that I'm not pregnant this winter...but I've managed to survive two snowy Iowa winters pregnant.

When you're expecting, your balance is off. It's normal. And falling is not good for pregnant women. However, I did find that owning a pair of Yak Trax always helped.

While putting the Yak Trax on and off of my shoes was a bit of a challenge, it sure beats slipping and falling and injuring baby or myself.

Tip Tuesday: Dealing with Morning Sickness.

So it is official - I am 20 weeks pregnant. Yes, this does explain why all my posts lately have been full of grammar errors more so than usual. This also explains why my co-author Sarah has been doing the bulk of the posts...because most days I have been too tired chasing my toddler around or I just finished throwing up my lunch.

Just like with Judah, I experienced morning sickness throughout my whole first trimester. In fact, I knew instantly when I was pregnant. One day I started feeling nauseous and the thought of any food seemed repulsive.

When you feel nauseous, nothing sounds good to eat. Your husband, like my sweet husband, has to literally cook all the food and clean up afterwards. As with me, any turn of the head with one (but the wrong) sniff of smell would send me running to the sink.

Even Judah caught on by plugging his own little nose and mouth with his hand calling things stinky. He also would go to the sink with me and pretend to cough. And when my diet became picky, Judah's diet also changed.

Morning sickness is never fun to go through. You feel just yucky all the time, ready to throw up at a moments notice. The only foods you can get down are the ones that sound remotely good and do not require a lot of chewing. Simple things like brushing your teeth, washing the dishes, and changing a dirty diaper suddenly seem like a huge production.

Going through morning sickness twice, I have learned a few tips along the way that at least lessens the bad feelings and yucky tastes. Luckily with Judah, I could lay down all the time.

Here is what I do for morning sickness. Please as with anything before trying talk to your own doctor about what is best for your situation.

1. Try chewing gum after you eat. This helps clean the teeth from leftover food particles that make you want to gag. Chewing gum also helps curb the bad after tastes that seem to penetrate your mouth and make you nauseous.

2. Try taking Unisom sleeping tablets offset with B-6 vitamins. Unisom can be bought over the counter and helps with nausea. The B-6 allows your food to be converted into the energy. With Judah I took two B-6 tablets during the day and a Unisom tablet right before bed throughout my whole pregnancy.

3. For a quick boost in energy and carbohydrates to curb the onslaught of nausea, try eating saltine crackers. Even more so, try eating saltine crackers when you wake up in the morning and before you get out of bed.

4. Snack before you go to sleep. In taking some extra protein (like Greek yogurt) lessens the nausea when you wake up.

5. Eat small meals more often. Personally, I have used Ensure to supplement my diet when I need a snack on the go.

Share your own experiences on dealing with morning sickness.

Salvation Sunday: Trust in Him

When I was younger, I would get mad when people would tell me that God has a plan and "everything happens for a reason". To be honest, the older I get, the more I believe it.

Of course a kid isn't going to understand why her Grandma had to die and that they're would be a reason good enough for it.

But yes, everything happens for a reason. Like our oldest son. David and I didn't intend to have a child before marriage, but we did. As soon as we found out I was pregnant, there was no question about it, for either of us. We didn't know where this journey was going to take us, but we knew we had a baby on the way.

And as often as our oldest makes me want to pull my hair out (he's WAY too logical and smart for five) I can't imagine my life without him.

It's because of moments like this. He came out of his room with his magna doodle and said, "See what I wrote, Mommy?"

God has a plan. God knows. Everything happens for a reason. We just need to trust in Him.